Here is a collection of humorous church bulletin bloopers (typographical errors) …
* Evening massage – 6 p.m.
* Don't let worry kill you. Let the church help.
* Thursday night … pot luck supper. Prayer and medication will follow.
* Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church.
* For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery down stairs.
* Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
* Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
* The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.
* At the evening service, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.
* This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of the church. Children will be baptised at both ends.
* Tuesday at four there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk please come early.
* The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the church basement Friday.
* The Reverend Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the congregation.
* The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, ‘Break Forth Into Joy."
* Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice.
* The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
* The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who laboured the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.
* Men's Prayer Breakfast. No charge, but your damnation will be gratefully accepted.
* This morning’s sermon: “Jesus walks on the water”. Tonight’s sermon: “Where is Jesus?”
* During this morning’s meeting, be sure to smile and say hell to someone new.
* Ladies, don’t forget our rummage sale. Here’s a good chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping. Bring your husband along.
[Source Unknown]
"A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person's strength." Prov 17:22. NLT