The 10 Commandments From a Dog’s Point of View

IMG_0944Our daughter, Natasha, turns 20 in a few weeks. We bought her a dog, with some help from the RSPCA. He is a labrador and is a little over 2 years of age. His name is Oscar. Oscar is very cute and has a peaceful nature.

While looking through a few other dog pounds with my wife, Nicole, we saw the following 10 Commandments from a Dog's Point of View. Worth repeating …

1. My life is likely to last 10-15 years; any separation from you will be painful for me. Remember that before you buy me.

2. Give me time to understand what you want from me; don't be impatient, short-tempered, or irritable.

3. Place your trust in me and I will always trust you back. Respect is earned not given as an inalienable right.

4. Don't be angry with me for long and don't lock me up as punishment; I am not capable of understanding why. I only know I have been rejected. You have your work, entertainment, and friends, but I only have you.

5. Talk to me sometimes. Even if I don't understand your words, I do understand your voice and your tone. You only have to look at my tail.

6. Be aware that however you treat me, I'll never forget it, and if it's cruel, it may affect me forever.

7. Please don't hit me. I can't hit back, but I can bite and scratch, and I really don't ever want to do that.

8. Before you scold me for being uncooperative, obstinate, or lazy, ask yourself if something might be bothering me. Perhaps I'm not getting the right foods or I've been out in the sun too long, or my heart is getting old and weak. It may be I am just dog-tired.

9. Take care of me when I get old. You too will grow old and may also need love, care, comfort, and attention.

10. Go with me on difficult journeys. Never say, "I can't bear to watch" or "Let it happen in my absence". Everything is easier for me if you are there. Remember, regardless of what you do, I will always love you.

[Source – Stan Rawlinson]

The Spiritual Discipline of Fasting

FastAt CityLife Church, we are about to commence a two-week season of prayer and fasting. Jesus fasted for 40 days at the beginning of his ministry, releasing great power into his ministry (Matthew 4:1-2), and he assumed that his disciples would fast also (Matthew 6:16-18). Fasting can be a powerful personal discipline to train our will, to help develop self-control, and to tune our spiritual sensitivity towards God. 

In fasting we choose to intentionally go without something for a period of time (usually something pleasurable but not necessarily sinful). It could be food (in a variety of forms) or some other activity (TV, music, etc). Fasting teaches us a lot about ourselves. It quickly reveals how much we are dependent on the pleasure of eating. It also demonstrates how powerful our body is and especially our appetite! Fasting seeks to confirm our dependence on God by finding strength from him alone. After all, it is not food that gives us true life; it is God’s word to us (Matthew 4:4). Life is much more than food (Luke 12:33) and our belly is not to become our god (Philippians 3:19. Romans 16:18).

Fasting is one of the more important ways of practising the self-denial required of everyone who would follow Christ. Fasting teaches self-control and therefore trains us in restraint with regard to all our fundamental desires and drives. We learn the value of ‘contentment’ (1 Timothy 6:6). Fasting is not an easy discipline but its practice yields great benefits in our lives, especially when accompanied by time in prayer and other spiritual disciplines.

As we move through this period of fourteen days of focused prayer, why not consider including some form of fasting. Most important of all, use the time you would normally be eating for time in conversation with God. 

Here are some recommended resources on fasting:

1. An excellent guide to fasting by Dr. Bill Bright.

2. Some medical advice on fasting.

3. Fasting for Spiritual Breakthrough by Elmer Towns

4. Fasting by Scot McKnight

5. Simplicity and Fasting by Jan Johnston

6. Fasting Made Easy by Dr Don Colbert

 

 

Reflections on Psalm 10

PsalmA few verses from Psalm 10, an ancient song with contemporary relevance …

Vs.1. O Lord, why do you stand so far away?
Why do you hide when I am in trouble?

Vs.2. The wicked arrogantly hunt down the poor.
Let them be caught in the evil they plan for others.

Vs.3. For they brag about their evil desires;
they praise the greedy and curse the Lord …

Vs.17. Lord, you know the hopes of the helpless; surely you will hear their cries and comfort them.

Vs.18. You will bring justice to the orphans and the oppressed, so mere people can no longer terrify them.

Let's be honest, sometimes God feels far away, especially when we are facing trouble (vs.1). It's so easy to assume that if God were with us we would always be 'blessed' and life would have no problems. 

The wicked are arrogant and defiant of God. They think that all will be well and that they will never pay for their evil deeds (vs.2-11).

But God does see our grief and trouble. He considers it and takes note of it (vs.14). God encourages the needy and listens to their cry. He defends the fatherless and the oppressed (vs.17-18). He calls the wicked to account.

As followers of Christ, we walk by faith and not by sight, by truth and not by feelings. God really is Immanuel = "God with us". He never leaves us or abandons us. He is right here, right now … always.

Life is a journey and we have to keep the end in mind. Although, there will be trials and challenges along the way, God will honour those who honour him, and eventually we all reap what we sow. God is true to his word and he does keep his promises. Of course, there is usually a delay or a gap between a promise and the fulfillment of that promise. Just ask Joseph.

Be encouraged today, whatever you may be going through. God loves you and he is actively working in your life, whatever the circumstances, bringing about his ultimate purpose. Instead of seeking to immediately get out of whatever pressure we may be under, sometimes it's good to ask God what he may want to teach us during these times. After all, the hard times can make us strong. 

Reflections on Psalm 9

PsalmThe Psalms are a collection of ancient songs, reflecting Israel's experience with God. In Psalm 9, David opens his song like this (vs.1-2):

 I will praise the Lord with all my heart;

 I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done.

 I will be filled with joy because of you.

 I will sing prises to your name, O Most High.

Note the order here:

1. Thankfulness. David took time to think of all the good things God had done. This cultivated a grateful attitude and outlook on life. He was focusing his mind on the positive, not everything that might have been going wrong.

2. Praise. As a result, David's mouth declared God’s works. He spoke out his praise. 

3. Joy. As a result, David was filled with joy because of God. Gratefulness always results in joyfulness.

4. Singing. David's heart then erupted into song. 

What good things has God done recently for you? Take time to reflect on them, praise him for them and allow his joy and song to fill your heart and life. What a difference that makes to the atmosphere of our world.

Reflections on Proverbs 2

A few reflections from Proverbs
2:
Prov

1. Wisdom will save you from the
immoral person. The path of lust leads to death and to hell. If you take that
route you are doomed and will never reach the path of life. Think about it.

2. Instead of following evil and
immoral people, follow the steps of good people and stay on the path of the
righteous. Ultimately, only the upright will live in the land and people of
integrity will be blessed. Wicked people will be removed from the land and
destroyed.

3. Who are the ‘good people’ that you
are following? Study their lives and the steps that they took. Learn from them
and save yourself from folly. Wisdom is learning from the successes and
mistakes of other people rather than from only personal experience, which can
take much longer and be much more painful.

4.The way to life is through
wisdom and godliness.  Any other option
leads to death. It’s as simple as that. Believe this – make it your value – and
live it out. Be smart.

5. Paradox: Wisdom is something we must strive vigorously to
achieve, yet it is a gift from God. Yes, work hard at studying wisdom
(primarily in the Scriptures), but knowing that wisdom ultimately comes
from God chastens our pride and leads to humility. Thank God for it. The same
paradox exists with the warrior in battle and the Christian in life
(Phil.2:12-13).

6. Cycle
(vs.5-6): Seek wisdom, find God; seek God, find wisdom. When you find wisdom,
thank God for it.

7. There are no imperatives in this chapter, only an extended appeal from a
father to a son to acquire wisdom. Yet, hear the urgency!

More wisdom for life.

Reflection on Proverbs 1


ProvA few reflections on Proverbs
1

1. Two things that we need are
‘wisdom’ and ‘discipline’. ‘Wisdom’ is living from God’s perspective on life
and ‘discipline’ is having the character to consistently do what you know is
right.

2. We must have a hunger for
wisdom and pursue it. Fearing God is the first step in the quest for a meaningful existence.

3. Acquiring wisdom is not a hard thing to do.

4. Who you hang around with has a
huge influence on who you become. Choose your friends wisely.

5. Good things tend to flow from wise behaviour (but not in a magical or guaranteed way).

6. Wisdom yearns to set people free from their foolish ways
and to impart a spirit of wisdom to them so that they will become wise. Wisdom
proactively shouts and cries out to the simple-minded, urging them to change.
How often she has called out to us. How often we have neglected her advice – to our own detriment.

7. If we reject the call of wisdom
over and over again, we move beyond the reach of her help. We may then search
for her but it will be too late. We will eat the bitter fruit of living our own
way. Our own complacency will have destroyed us. What’s the point? Listen to wisdom! Accept her advice and
pay attention to her correction. If you do, you will live in peace and safety,
unafraid of harm.

8. Hear the urgency of Wisdom's appeal! Her appeal is made to all. To be complacent is as bad as outright rejection (vs.32). Wisdom wants the fool, the immature (simple), and the mocker to know the horrible consequences of not obeying her, so they will respond positively to her right away.

Great advice for wise living. 

Your Life is an Adventure

AdventI think it is quite significant that two big-time movies helped to kick off 2013: Les Miserables (based on the classic novel by Victor Hugo), which is about living life as forgiven people who forgive others, letting go of revenge and embracing redemption, and The Hobbit (based on the book by J.R.R. Tolkein), which is about the call to an adventure … slaying dragons in this world.

Life really is to be an adventure (just ask Bilbo
Baggins) … a journey that involves faith and risk. God calls us out of it
comfort zones into a new world, walking with him in complete trust and
obedience. There are dragons to slay and mountains to conquer. Off you go! The
Father is calling and His Spirit is leading.  

Here are a few spontaneous thoughts I wrote down in my journal earlier this week during a time of prayer …

Mark, don’t allow yourself to become
too serious, where your life becomes more of a burden than a joyful adventure.
Take off all of the yokes of expectations of others and of
yourself that are not of me. All I call you to do is to know me … to hear me speak and to see what I am doing … then to minister out
of that revelation. Nothing more, nothing less. Every day. Keep it simple … 

The enemy seeks to lure you away from
the simplicity of your devotion to Christ. Life is simply about loving God and
then loving people. That’s it … and all of this is
in response to the overwhelming revelation that you are loved by God. We love
him because he first loved us. He is devoted to us.Now there is an amazing
truth. He pursues us … he desires us … he longs for us … his creatures. 

Live each day knowing you are already loved by me. There is nothing you need to do to earn or merit that
love. It is a free gift that I have already given to you. Allow that love to
fill you and to overwhelm you. Let it draw you … back to me. May your love
for me simply be a natural response of my love for you. 
Keep this as your daily focus and
you will be amazed at what we do together this year.

May the life of faith be a true adventure for you this year. Listen for God’s voice … then take some steps of faith. Faith is often spelt R I S K. You have to get out on a limb if you want to find the fruit. You have to get out of the boat if you want to walk on water. You have to launch out into the deep if you want to find a big catch. Can you hear Him calling? 

A Few Quotes about Adventure:

“A ship is safe in harbor, but that’s not what ships are for.” [William Shedd]

“I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it’s very difficult to find anyone … I should think so — in these parts! We are plain quiet folk and have no use for adventures. Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things! Make you late for dinner!” [J.R.R. Tolkein in The Hobbit]

“To venture causes anxiety, but not to venture is to lose one’s self…. And to venture in the highest is precisely to be conscious of one’s self.” [Soren Kierkegaard]

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” [Helen Keller]

“I have discovered that even the mediocre can have adventures and even the fearful can achieve.” [Edmund Hilary]

“Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail” [Ralph Waldo Emerson]

“An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered.” [G.K. Chesterton]

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” [Mark Twain]

“To fall in love with God is the greatest romance; to seek him the greatest adventure; to find him, the greatest human achievement.” [Saint Augustine of Hippo]

An Invitation from Jesus (Reflections on Matthew 11:28-30)

GraceIn Matthew 11:28-30, Jesus is quoted as saying, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke fits perfectly, and the burden I give you is light."  

The Message Bible puts it this way: "Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me – watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

Jesus comes to give us rest from our burdens. However, we must yoke ourselves to him and learn from him. He is humble and gentle. He wants us to find rest for our souls. His yoke fits perfectly and it is intended to be a light burden not a heavy one.

If we are overly stressed then maybe we are taking on other people’s yokes or burdens and not the Master’s one, which is uniquely designed for us. How’s the weight today?

There is to be a joy in our walk with God and our ministry for him. There is a freeedom and a lightness in which we are to live – almost a carefree attitude and approach. We are not God. He is. Adjust your expectations to be in line with his. Burnout results from us taking on more than we should and living at a pace faster than we should be going. There is a time to work and there is a time to rest, wasting time with God and simply enjoying his world.

Learn the rhythms of grace which include a balanced oscillation between activity and rest, work and play, engagement and disengagement.

God's call is not 'heavy' – a weight that we lack the power to bear or carry.

God's call is not 'ill-fitting' – it matches the gifts and shape in which he has created us.

God's call is 'free' and 'light' – there is a joy and an excitement in it. You can do this! It's not beyond you; it's within your reach. Christ is with you and for you.

[CityLife Church 2013 Bible Reading plan]

The Changing Shape of Temptation (Barna Report)

TemptIt’s that time again — the beginning of a new year when people resolve to make some changes in their lives. New Year’s resolutions are certainly nothing new. In fact, for many people, they are the same year after year. Making and breaking resolutions is something of a tradition. A new study from the Barna Group examines the temptations Americans say they most commonly struggle with — and how they resolve to deal with these moral and ethical lures.

The research reveals some new, and not so new, aspects to the temptations facing today’s adults. The research was conducted in conjunction with a book project from Todd Hunter called Our Favorite Sins.

New Temptations
Resolutions relating to technology are becoming more common—particularly those that involve spending less time on it. The research shows nearly half of Americans (44%) say they are tempted to spend too much time with media, including the Internet, television and video games. Another “new” media-related temptation is to express anger or “go off” on someone by text or email. Overall, one out of nine Americans (11%) say they often or sometimes feel tempted to do this.

Though sexual sins are nothing new, viewing pornography online continues to escalate and take on new forms as the Internet and social media evolve. Nearly one in five Americans (18%) say they are tempted to view pornography or sexually inappropriate content online. Men more commonly admit being tempted to view porn than women (28% versus 8%).

It is not surprising the most technologically oriented generation—the Millennials, or Mosaics—are more likely than average to admit to struggling with these temptations of modern technology. More than half of Millennials (53%) say they are tempted to over-use screens and one-quarter (25%) feel the temptation to use technology to express their anger at others. When it comes to viewing pornography online, Millennials are significantly more likely than other generations to admit to wrestling with this temptation: more than one quarter (27%) say they are tempted by online pornography, while only 22% of Busters, 15% of Boomers and 8% of Elders say the same.

Old Temptations
Most temptations are not so modern. Americans are still facing the same age-old deadly sins that humanity’s always wrestled with. Though, naturally, the more serious the sin, the fewer people admit to being tempted by it. Which, perhaps explains why “eating too much” is up near the top of the list of admitted temptations—more than half (55%) say they are tempted to overeat. While doing something sexually inappropriate with someone is at the bottom—less than one in ten Americans (9%) admit to this. As might be expected, the older the person, the more likely they are to struggle with overeating (though this decreases from Boomers to Elders) and the younger the person, the more likely they are to face sexual temptations (21% of Millennials admit to being tempted to sin sexually with someone verses only 11% of Busters, 5% of Boomers and 3% of Elders).

When it comes to other more “traditional” sins, about one-third of Americans admit to spending too much money (35%), one-quarter say they are tempted to gossip or say mean things about others (26%), a similar number struggle with envy or jealousy (24%), a little more than one in ten admit to being tempted to lie or cheat (12%) and about the same number say they are tempted by alcohol or drugs (11%).

Though Millennials admit to being more tempted by these things than any other generation, the answers are fairly consistent across ages. The one exception being envy or jealousy, which Millennials are significantly more likely to admit to (41% verses 29% of Busters, 19% of Boomers and 15% of Elders). This is perhaps a life-stage factor as twentysomethings try to find their place and establish a lifestyle. Though it could also point to the effects of nearly ubiquitous consumer advertising on a generation that’s been marketed to more than any previous age group.

Observations
David Kinnaman, president of Barna Group, directed the study and offered four observations on the findings:

First, morality in America is undergoing a shift. One example of that is how temptation has gone "virtual." It now shadows many of the digital domains of contemporary life. Nearly half of Americans admit to being tempted to use too much media and one in nine admit to expressing their anger digitally. For faith leaders, this shift underscores the importance of including technology and media as part of a broader discussion of spirituality and stewardship.

Second, Millennials are significantly more likely to admit to being lured by most of the temptations assessed in the research. Why is that? Given their stage of life, are they simply more likely to be confronted by tempting situations than are older generations? Or is it that younger adults are more comfortable admitting to them in the context of a survey? Perhaps the perceived social consequences of being honest about personal struggles are dropping—or it’s merely the angst of youth, worrying about things older adults simply no longer worry as much about. The bigger concern is if Millennials are beginning to accept these emotions as normal and not inherently wrong—as a result of media influence, normative peer behavior and shifting values. Whatever the case, a distinct moral perspective seems to be emerging among younger adults when compared to older generations. Millions of Millennials do not see temptation as something to be avoided, but rather a relatively benign feature of modern life.

Third, distinctly work-related vices top the list of Americans' temptations. As a society, are Americans really most concerned with procrastination and productivity? People seem to be more aware of (or willing to admit to) "sins" that actually make them look better—i.e., it's somewhat self-serving to admit procrastination or laziness because it reflects well on one's work ethic. But few people want to admit to being envious or mean or tempted sexually. But, of the list, productivity is not exactly the most biblical pursuit—that specific "temptation" is much more reflective of American values than of core biblical themes.

Finally, only 1% of Americans of any age are able to articulate that giving in to temptation might be caused by sin. Most Americans think of temptation more as a steady stream of highs and lows that must be navigated. This reveals a gap in biblical thought on the subject of temptation among the nation’s population.

* Read the complete report to learn more about particular Western temptations, why people give in and whether resistence is futile.

Leadership Lessons from the Bonsai (Guest Post)

BonsaiI really enjoyed the insights from this BLOG post on leadership by David M.Dye …

A mature bonsai tree commands attention. With just one tree a master evokes an entire landscape and tells a story of power, perseverance, struggle, or abundance.
As I’ve studied bonsai, I realized that the art of growing these trees has much to say to aspiring leaders. To accomplish this elegant combination of grace and strength, great bonsai practitioners must be both gifted horticulturists and artists.
In the same way, leading people entails both vision and cultivation. Here then, are 12 most inspiriting bonsai leadership lessons:

1. Focus on strength and directing energy, not fixing weakness. Peter Drucker told us long ago that nothing is built on weakness. In bonsai, the artist looks for a tree’s strengths. What is unique and special? What can be showcased?
The artist, like an effective leader, looks for strengths and builds on those. You can be aware of weaknesses so as to manage them and keep them from hindering strength, but focus on strength — in people, in yourself, and in your team.
These strengths are what produce results.

2. Growth requires patience. A fully developed bonsai can take decades to reach perfection. You collect material, let it rest and grow out for two or three years, prune and shape, then wait some more.
One of my very favorite trees is on display at the National Arboretum in Washington D.C. It is a white pine almost 400 years old! It’s an awe-inspiring sight, made all the more so by the fact that this tree survived the bombing of Hiroshima.
There are no shortcuts to produce growth. Nothing less than four centuries make that tree what it is. You would not force an apple tree’s blossoms open — you would ensure it had adequate sun, water, and nutrients in the soil. Then it will bloom and fruit.
But sometimes we force ourselves and our teams out of season. We push when we should rest. Or rest when we should study. Or move when we should question. Or question when it’s time to act.
Effective leaders are aware of their own seasons and the seasons of their teams. They work within these seasons and provide what is needed.

3. Treat individuals as individuals. A skilled bonsai artist knows that you cannot prune a trident maple at the same time of year as a juniper. Not all trees are the same.
People are also unique. Different people should be treated differently. What motivates one person may be terrifying or humiliating for another.
Effective leaders understand the people they lead and learn how to maximize their each person’s potential.

4. Healthy conditions = growth. You cannot force a tree to grow. Rather, you provide the right nutrients, fresh air, sunlight, water, and soil and the tree will naturally grow. It’s what trees do.
People and organizations are much the same. Healthy organizations have healthy cultures and in healthy cultures, healthy people accomplish great things.
If your people aren’t growing and producing what you believe they’re capable of, its time to examine the culture and systems they work in.

5. Appearances don’t tell the whole story. With certain trees there are times of year when you might swear the thing is dead. Some of the greatest abstract juniper trees have vast amounts of dead wood. A tree (and a person’s) potential is not just what you see.
In a tree, you look for life in the roots, in the channels that carry sap to the branches.
In a person, you look for character. For integrity. For the desire to learn and willingness to try.
And when those are there, you:

6. Nourish or encourage what you want more of. A bonsai master knows which of three buds on the tip of a branch will be strong and best serve the tree. That bud is encouraged. If other buds would steal energy, they are removed.
You cannot wave a magic wand in bonsai or in leadership and have the right branch, team, or skills spring into existence. These things must be grown. If you want more creativity, encourage it and remove barriers to healthy risk. If you want more ownership, nourish responsibility and remove impediments to implementing ideas. If you want to strengthen customer relationships, remove policies that prevent staff from serving.

7. Pruning is beneficial. Sometimes a branch or an entire limb needs to be removed for the health of the tree or so its full potential can be realized.
In an organization, it is a vital practice to ask what we need to stop doing.
What methods, products, or services are no longer beneficial or serving the mission? With limited time, money, and people, effective leaders set aside activities that do not serve their teams and the mission.

8. Every part needs light to thrive. When caring for a tree, great attention is given to make cure that every set of leaves or needles receives the light it needs. Without this care, interior leaves are weakened and will ultimately wither and die.
In organizations we can shade out essential people who make a difference every day, but aren’t the glamorous ‘face’ of the organization.
Do you treat your cleaning staff with the same dignity as your executives? Do you show appreciation to everyone in the organization for their contribution to the mission?

9. Mistakes are necessary for growth. “Killing trees is the tuition you pay for learning bonsai.” ~ John Naka. No one enjoys making mistakes, but they are the price of knowledge. Effective leaders create safe environments for their team to make mistakes and learn what to do next time.
“Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.” ~ Albert Einstein

10. Mastery is a lifetime pursuit.
I once read a bonsai master claim that the last task he was allowed to do after years of apprenticing was to water the trees. Now, after a lifetime of practice, he was just beginning to understand how to water correctly.
There is always more for a leader to learn. Our environments change, our teams change, the people in our teams are themselves growing and learning. If you want to be effective, make learning an ongoing habit.

11. You cannot change the core. When selecting a tree, the bonsai master knows that some qualities of the tree cannot be changed. The general shape and strength of the trunk, the position of key limbs, the way the roots spread into the ground — these things are core to the tree and cannot be changed later.
Likewise, effective leaders know that they cannot change people. No matter how hard you work at it, forcing a gregarious people-person to work in isolation all day will end in failure.
Effective leaders work diligently to find people with a passion for the mission and the skills their work requires.
You cannot change the core of a tree or the core of a person, trees (and people) have natural strengths, values, and motivations. Your job is to reveal what is there.

12. Nothing is perfect. Some of the most inspiring bonsai tell a story. Perhaps the tale is of a lifetime fighting salt-laden storms blowing in from sea — or the struggle to survive hostile conditions in the cleft of a rock far above tree line.
These stories and a bonsai’s grace often result from the tree’s imperfections. The masters incorporate dead wood, twisted branches, and even wounds into the design to reveal the essence of the tree.
Even the view of the tree is specifically selected — few trees are meant to be viewed from every angle.
Leadership is not about perfection. It’s about improving the condition of your team and accomplishing the mission. Just as there is no ideal tree, neither is there a single ideal person … 

Your turn:
As in bonsai, effective leaders look for strengths, manage imperfections, and aim for magnificent results.

* How do you build on the strengths of your team?

* How do you encourage what you want more of?

* How do you prune away what needs to stop?

[Source]

Stages of Life (Late Adulthood)

LateThe pool of those living beyond 100 – the centenarians of society – is increasing in leaps and bounds (70,000 in USA in 2007 increasing to 834,000 in 2050; over 4,252 in Australia as of June, 2011, up from 203 just 40 years ago). Demographers are now starting to the number of ‘super-centenarians’ – people over the age of 110 (300 450 currently)!

So life can be prolonged, but eventually we will all die … unless Jesus returns in our lifetime. Eventually the life clock must run down and the human body must die.

People at this stage of life need to feel loved and valued, especially in a society that values productivity and youth, qualities that are in short supply among the aged. What a shame it is that elderly are often denigrated by society.

Let’s tap into the historical mind of these people – their memories and experiences, their perspective, their stories, their vision. They have done a lot of living – successes and failures, as well as mistakes and solutions. The greatest gift we can give our elders is our attention. We must simply listen to them once again. In doing so, we can gain wisdom beyond our years.

Late in life, the elderly ask themselves, “Did my life have any meaning?”

Some Suggestions: 

  1. Think about how you would you like to be remembered.

  2. Visit family and friends. Offer your presence.

  3. Comfort someone who has lost a loved one.

  4. Volunteer your time or contribute financially to a good cause.

As you reflect on the various stages of life that we have covered, where are you? What about those around you? What’s happening in your life right now? What is God up to?

You’re Blessed!

The Gospel of Matthew records five main teaching discourses from Jesus. Matthew 5-7 is Jesus' call to righteousness, which is about doing the will of God. Jesus is teaching his disciples and the multitudes from the mountain. Jesus begins with what is commonly called The Beatitudes which are the blessings of God (Matt.5:1-12). The Latin word for "blessed" isbeati.  

Blessed

I love Eugene Peterson's take on this:

  • You're blessed when you're at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule. 
  • You're blessed when you feel you've lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.
  • You're blessed when you're content with just who you are– no more, no less. That's the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can't be bought.
  • You're blessed when you've worked up a good appetite for God. He's food and drink in the best meal you'll ever eat.
  • You're blessed when you care. At the moment of being 'carefull,' you find yourselves cared for. 
  • You're blessed when you get your inside world– your mind and heart– put right. Then you can see God in the outside world. 
  • You're blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That's when you discover who you really are, and your place in God's family.
  • You're blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God's kingdom. Not only that– count yourselves blessed every time people put you down or throw you out or speak lies about you to discredit me. What it means is that the truth is too close for comfort and they are uncomfortable. You can be glad when that happens– give a cheer, even!– for though they don't like it, I do! And all heaven applauds. And know that you are in good company. My prophets and witnesses have always gotten into this kind of trouble. Matthew 5:3-12. Message Bible

In pronouncing these blessings, Jesus is not saying "try hard to live like this." He is saying that people who already are like this are in good shape. They should be happy and celebrate because of the work that Jesus is now doing.

These are not timeless truths about how the world is. Mourners often go un-comforted, the meek don't always inherit the earth, and those who long for justice often find it eludes them in this life. This is an upside-down world. But Jesus is bringing good news with the proclamation of his kingdom. No matter what our condition, God is on the move. A new covenant is about to be put in place. New promises are being made. God's kingdom is near. We can enter it and live under it's rule right here, right now. That's good news.

Wise words worth reflecting on.

Stages of Life (Mature Adulthood)

AdultIn medieval times the Catholic worldview of the human life
span was often depicted as a circle. In the centre was the image of Christ. Around this divine hub, were illustrations of the different ages of life from infancy to the grave. Each age, like a spoke, was equidistant from the hub. This suggested that every point in human life existed in the same sacred relationship to the divine.

During the Protestant Reformation in the 16th century, this symbolism underwent a profound and lasting change. Instead of a circle, the image of an ascending and descending staircase became prevalent. The image seemed better suited to the new importance of work, ambition and changing social roles in the emerging market economy of Protestant Europe. This is where we developed our notion of the stages of life, like steps going upward and then downward. At the highest step was a man or woman at the age of fifty – the peak of life.

The staircase model of human development, which views the fifties as the beginning of decline, has undergone a major transformation of late. Nowadays experts are more likely to conceptualise the life span tableau as five ascending stairs (a decade for each), with a wide platform at the top for those
in their fifties and sixties (and even for many in their seventies and eighties), before a rather quick drop into illness and death. At age fifty, most of us can look forward to another thirty years of life. Advances in medicine and education mean that people in their 50s, 60s, and 70s are healthier, better educated, and have the prospect of far more able years ahead of them than was the case for their parents or grandparents.

For many people, mature adulthood represents the time of greatest satisfaction. You’ve passed beyond the insecurities of early adulthood (“Will anyone love me?” “Will I find a place for myself in the world of work?”). You’ve reconciled with many of the anxieties of midlife (“I’m growing older!” “Will I achieve my dreams?”). But you haven’t reached old age when chronic illness and concerns about approaching death can take centre stage. You’ve raised a family perhaps, and seen your young ones leave the nest and live independent lives, freeing you up to enjoy your own life more fully. After
years of work, you’ve hopefully accumulated at least some degree of financial security. You’ve perhaps begun to take on satisfying new roles as a grandparent, mentor, and/or community leader.

Contrary to all those “over the hill” greeting cards – life in the 50s, 60s and beyond can in many cases be better than what went before. Of course, we need to adjust to an aging body. “At 40, you know you’re not as young as you used to be. At 50, you realise it almost every day.” Adopting a healthy lifestyle helps immensely.

A vital key to successful aging appears to involve the capacity to give back to the community in some meaningful way. Its time to nurture and care for future generations on a more collective basis. Generativity is about receiving something from the past, putting your unique contribution into it, and passing it on to the future. It’s what you do when you stand between the generations.  This greatly affects psychological well-being at this stage of life.

Many people at this age feel squeezed between two generations. One woman said, “It is as if there are two mirrors before me, each held at a partial angle. I see part of myself in my mother who is growing old, and part of her in me. In the other mirror, I see part of myself in my daughter. I have had some dramatic insights, just looking into those mirrors … It is a set of revelations that I suppose can only come when you are in the middle of three generations.” Role reversal can occur too, where the children become the parents and the parents become the children. For instance, a woman may just finish raising their children then have to care for ailing parents. This can be draining for some.

At some stage, parents die. That’s hard for all of us. Alexander Levy says, “Parents provide a unique spot on this planet, which is called “home”, where we can return, if we need to, to be loved and feel like we belong … after parents dies, its gone.” This is an unfathomable loss, regardless of the location or quality of that place called ‘home.’ No wonder, C.S. Lewis said, “The death of a loved one is like an amputation.” Like amputees, we often reach to scratch what is missing … only to discover there is nothing there.

Some Suggestions:

  1. Become a teacher, mentor, referee, or coach. Volunteer. Share your expertise with the world. Avoid the dangers of stagnation and inward-focused selfishness. Cultivate generosity.

2. Find a cause you are passionate about. Don’t retire and die. “There is no age limit to enthusiasm, and retirement is a period in which individuals can discover or rediscover their passionate interests.”

  1. Nurture life long friendships and give the gift of love.

  2. Have a healthy and active mind. Keep learning.

Stages of Life (Midlife)

MidLike the sun sweeping through the sky, midlife (ages 35-50) is like noon-time, dividing the first and second halves of life. At the stroke of noon, the descent begins. Note that what we consider midlife, was for most of history in fact the end of life for most peopleAs recently as 1900, the life span of the average adult in the Western world was only 47. We have been blessed to have extra decades added to the average life span in our time.

Midlife is a season that can be like moving through muddy waters. Some people experience what is referred to as a “midlife crisis” during this time (first written about in 1965). Midlife signals that youth and childhood are gone, that maturity is now the chief developmental task in life, and that death is something that looms up ahead as an inevitable prospect. Many undergo a crisis of meaning.

The physical changes of aging begin to occur here – the need for reading glasses, sore joints, changes to hair, changes in energy levels, injuries, weight changes, and menopause for women. 

Children start to leave home; aging  parents require closer attention as their health begins to decline. Some experience depression and trouble eating, sleeping, and functioning at work. Others have regrets over choices made 10-20 years earlier. We may feel the pain and distance of the lost years of youth. Regret can kick in, due to unmet dreams.

Some midlifers have climbed the ladder of achievement in the workplace toward higher and higher levels. Some find success isn’t all it was cut out to be (or ask, “What now?”) while others discover they have been climbing the wrong ladder.

Time feels like it is moving really fast and there is a good mathematical reason for this. One year in the life of a 2 year old is 50% of her total existence. While one year for a 50 year old, is only 2% of her life span.

Peter Drucker, the father of modern management and renowned author once said, “People now have two lives – Life 1 and Life 2 – and they are over prepared for life 1 and under prepared for life 2. And there is no university for the second half of life”. Are you ready for the second half of your life?

The apostle John tells us the the things the world values will pass away – possessions, pleasure, and prestige – while the person who does the will of God will last forever. What lasts forever? Loving God, loving people, and investing your time, talents and resources in God's work on earth. What really matters to you? How should you live your life in light of eternity?

Some Suggestions: 

1. Begin to cultivate what was neglected in the first half of life.

2. Take time to contemplate – engage in deeper reflection and evaluation (life deserves a good mulling over). Reflect on where your life is going and what ultimate meaning is for you.

3. Balance outer achievements with less material pursuits such as family and spirituality.

4. Take a break from the hustle and bustle. Find a quiet space to reflect on the deeper meaning of your life. Get off the treadmill of daily routine temporarily in order to assess the big picture of your life.

5. Modify your goals. Make a new list.

6. Start to give care and nurture to others (“generativity”). 

Next: Mature Adulthood

Stages of Life (Early Adulthood)

YAEarly Adulthood (20-35 years of age) is a time of leaving the familiar world of family, parents, community, school and entering the big unknown world. It is a break with the past and a move into future. Of course, the very term "adult" is very hard to define. When do you become an adult? When you can drive, vote, drink or when you are married? It is a fuzzy line and for many the transition is a slow process. Some young adults are staying home longer. After all, why leave when there is free rent, cooking, TV and washing? 

Young adults often have some kind of life dream – a desire to achieve great things. They have plans and possibly a sense of calling to pursue something important. It is a time of idealism that will eventually be balanced with a good dose of realism. Mark Twain noted this when he said, “When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much he had learned in 7 years.”

This may be a time of further education and then eventually entering the work force as young adults embark on their own career, a time of achievement. Relationally, there is a search for someone to love, then possibly the setting up of a new home. Some become parents of children. 

Around age 30, many experience some kind of transition. Maybe there is disillusionment (from still being single), an emotional crisis (possibly from a relational breakdown), or a career change.

Single people are not second class citizens. They are to be given full acceptance and affirmation. They are not abnormal or to be viewed with suspicion. Marriage is not a superior status to singleness, nor visa versa. Both marriage and singleness are gifts from God. Being single is not ‘second best’ or a life doomed to misery and incompleteness.

Singleness is not in any way inferior to marriage. In fact, you are better off happily single than unhappily married. The apostle Paul preferred singleness and encouraged people to consider it as a life choice (1 Cor.7:7-9, 27-28). Jesus was a single too. Singles are not half a person. We are complete in Christ, not through marriage. Marriage is ordained by God, yet it is not obligatory for everyone.

Some of the unique challenges that single people face include loneliness, low feelings of self-worth, problems with identity and life direction, pressure from married people (the 'matchmakers'!), maintaining sexual purity, and possibly or parenting alone.

Reflecting on the lives of both Jesus and Paul, we see that some keys for single people living an enjoyable and fruitful life are: (1) establishing an intimate relationship with God as Father, (2) developing healthy, non-romantic friendships, and (3) having a sense of purpose for life.

Singles, know that God loves you and has a purpose for your life. Marrieds, let's be sure to reach out to singles, giving them heaps of encouragement, care and support. After all, we are all a part of God's bigger family. 

Some Suggestions:

1. Find some mentors, teachers and role models who you can learn from.

2. Foster the sense of enterprise of this season of your life. Try new things. Follow your dreams. Learn from your mistakes.

3. Develop lots of healthy friendships.

4. Find a worthy cause to give your time and energy to.

 Next: Midlife