Connecting

"Edward Hallowell writes that for most people the two most powerful experiences in life are achieving and connecting. Most of what grabs our attention and commands our energy falls under these two categories.

Connecting has to do with our relational world – things like falling in love, forming great friendships, being cared for when we are sick, or receiving words of deep affection from parents.

Achieving has to do with our accomplishments – winning contests, pursuing career success, or realising a difficult goal.

Hallowell points out that our society is increasingly devoted to, obsessed with, and enslaved by achieving, and increasingly bankrupt and impoverished when it comes to connecting. Achievement for its own sake has become an idol in our society.

Achieving is not a bad thing – when it’s done in the right way for the right reasons. But it is no substitute for connecting. In fact, the only really significant achievements are those that enrich the life of community.

It is impossible to live isolated, lonely and unconnected and have a meaningful, joy-filled life. Human beings who give themselves to relational greatness – who have friends they laugh with, cry with, learn with, fight with, dance with, live and love and grow old and die with – these are the human beings who lead magnificent lives."

[Source: Everybody's Normal Til You Get To Know Them by John Ortberg, p.30-31]