Mark Conner Personal Development

Refuel (Pt.7)

Refuel Today, let’s look at one more way to refuel …

5. Invest Time in Reflection and Contemplation. The Sabbath was not only a time for rest and recreation. It was a time for stillness, reflection and contemplation about life, its meaning, its direction, and God’s activity within it. It was a time for spiritual renewal – to reconnect with the holy and recharge the internal batteries.

Jesus took regular time aside from the demands of the pressing crowd to connect with his Father and ensure that his priorities and his life’s direction were aligned correctly. Was Jesus a workaholic? No. Yes, he at times pushed himself to the limits, but not all the time. He set limits in his life and he took time to reflect and relax (Luke 5:15-16). Jesus often pulled out of the pressure and busyness in order to “centre” his life, spending time with his Father. This was his custom – his frequent pattern of action. As a result of regular reflection and contemplation, Jesus always knew what was important (his priorities), he learned to say ‘no’ to the unimportant, and he remained emotionally healthy.

These are the kind of benefits that can be ours when we take regular time for reflection and contemplation. Here are some good things to do while “reflecting”:

Continue reading “Refuel (Pt.7)” →

Mark Conner Personal Development

Refuel (Pt.6)

Refuel Let’s look at another way to refuel …


4. Plan Regular Time for Rest and Recreation. God didn’t design us to work constantly without rest. God worked for six days and then rested on the seventh. Not because he was tired or because he needed time off, but because rest (not working) is good. The Sabbath was established in Old Testament times for rest and relaxation from the busyness of the week’s work. Although, we don’t keep a literal Sabbath Day under the New Covenant, the principle of taking regular time for rest and recreation is still as true today as it was back then. God blessed both work and rest. Good quality rest can restore your good mood as well as your capacity to function. God made us spirit, soul and body. We often neglect our soul and our body thinking that these areas of life are not ‘spiritual’ or important. The truth is that we need a holistic view of life. God is interested in our spirit, soul AND body (1 Thess.5:23).



Jesus also, in all his busyness of ministry, took time aside to rest and to sleep when he was tired. Jesus, though completely God, was fully human. He experienced our physical limitations and he had to look after his physical body. This meant proper exercise, healthy eating and adequate sleep. A balanced diet, regular exercise and adequate rest give you energy, improve your health and extend you’re the length of your life. They help you to refuel.



Jesus also set limits and arranged for times of rest (Mark 6:31). In the same way, we need to learn to relax (“let go”) and rest without feeling guilty. Relaxation is a wonderful “stress buster”. It reduces stress. Relax hourly, daily and weekly. Force yourself into inactivity. Be quiet, get comfortable, relax your muscles and focus your attention. Like a rubber band, we are designed to be stretched but if we never have times of relaxation we will begin to crack. Regular times of rest and recreation are great ways to refuel!

Mark Conner Personal Development

Refuel (P.5)

Refuel Last week we looked at two practical things that help us to refuel, especially spiritually – (1) spending time alone with God every day and (2) participating in church gatherings every week. These practices are part of how God refuels us for our journey. God works through BOTH our personal relationship with him and our community with other believers. BOTH are important. One without the other will be detrimental to our faith and our well being. Let’s continue today with some additional things that can help us refuel, not just spiritually.



Let’s look at another key way to refuel …



3. Enjoy Your Family and Friends. God created for us for community – for meaningful relationships. No one was meant to do life ‘alone’. God himself is a relational God, existing as three persons within what is referred to as the Trinity – Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Jesus, the Son of God come to earth, spent hours with a small group of people, his disciples, who he called his ‘friends’ – walking on along the road, rowing a boat, eating a meal (Mark 3:14). Then Christ’s followers in the early church spent much time together with each other. They “devoted themselves” to activities such as “fellowship”, which means close relationship and partnership together in life (Acts 2:42-47). This all goes to reinforce that life is all about relationships (“people”) not tasks (“things”). Yes, there are tasks to accomplish and things to do, but these exist to serve people. Relationship first, task second. How often we get it wrong.



Friends are a valuable gift from God. Don’t isolate yourself. When you’re stressed, you need your relationships more, not less. What a joy it is to spend time with ‘emotional replenishing people’ – those who pour back into us rather than draining us. Spend time with people you enjoy being around. The family is also very important to God. Love your family and develop warmth and intimacy with them. No one on their deathbed wished they had spent more time in the office. Plan special times and events together with your friends and family members. Learn to have fun, to recreate, to enjoy life and to laugh. Develop a good sense of humour. The more you enjoy life the healthier you tend to be. The Bible says that a “cheerful heart” is like a good medicine (Proverbs 17:22). Special times with family and good friends are a great way to refuel!

Mark Conner Personal Development

Refuel (Pt.4)

Refuel Before we move on, let’s pause and reflect on what we’ve covered so far.


Here are a few questions you might want to think about today:

  1. Do you think life is becoming more stressful? If so, what are some of the indicators?
  2. Describe a time when you felt like you were ‘running on empty’. What did it feel like, what were some of the contributing factors, and what did you do about it?
  3. Discuss the concept of ‘margin’. Why is it important and how do we create it in our lives?
  4. What can we learn from the habits of Jesus? Read Luke 5:15-16 .
  5. Read Jeremiah 2:13 and think about its application for us today. Why is it so easy to neglect time with God?
  6. Think about a time you had alone with God that was personally impacting. What happened?
  7. What are some of the benefits of regular church attendance?
  8. What are some of the benefits of regular involvement in a small group?
  9. What are some of the dynamics that occur when a follower of Christ begins to attend church only infrequently?
  10. Discuss the metaphor of ‘refuelling’ – what are some other things you do to help when you’re feeling like you’re running on empty?

Next week, we’ll be looking at a few more practical ways to refuel, especially when it comes to our emotional world.

Mark Conner Personal Development

Refuel (Pt.3)

Refuel How else can we refuel?


2. Participate in Church Gatherings Every Week.



In addition to spending time along with him, God also wants us as his people to gather together on a regular basis. He has designed these gatherings to be part of his process for refuelling us for our journey. We live in a world that saps and drains us of our spiritual reserves. We need to be filled up again regularly – with his love, his Spirit, his hope, and his joy. Gathering with other believers is an important part of this becoming a reality in our lives.


We gather to worship God together, to receive spiritual input, to fellowship together, to be reminded of our vision, and to serve others with our gifts. This is all part of how God refuels us for our journey. It helps to keep our values aligned and our life headed in the right direction.



The truth is that the majority of people don’t go to church anymore and even many Christians can tend to be fairly slack in the consistency of their attendance, attending infrequently or hardly at all. No wonder so many people are feeling dry spiritually and lack spiritual passion in their life.



Why should we attend church regularly?


Jesus did (Luke 4:16), the early church did (Acts 2:42-47), God commands it (Heb.10:24-25), the Spirit works in special ways when Christ’s body gathers, your very presence is an encouragement to other believers and to the leaders of the church, and you are leaving a legacy for the next generation.


Gathering together with other believers on a weekly basis is important. Of course, just being together is one thing but HOW we come is even more important. If we want to see dynamic gatherings where God is at work then we need to come with expectation, faith, and a willingness to respond and to participate in what is happening.


Church attendance is not a spectator sport. It’s something that we engage in with all our heart and soul … and like most things in life we tend to get out of it what we put into it. Do you want to refuel? Make church gatherings a priority in your weekly schedule.

Mark Conner Personal Development

Refuel (Pt.2)

Refuel Let’s look at a few practical things we can do to refuel. First we’ll focus on some activities for refuelling our spiritual life. Then next week we’ll look at things related more to our relational and emotional health.



1. Spend Time Alone with God Every Day.


As followers of Christ, God is the source of our very life. As the apostle Paul said, “In him we live, and move, and have our being” (Acts 17:28). Yes, our very next breath comes from him. In a very real sense, we are to live our life ‘in God’s presence’ or with an awareness that he is always with us. We are to ‘do life’ together with God, involving him in every aspect of our daily life. ALL of life is sacred and God is interested in every aspect of our lives. However, there is something special than can occur when we pull aside from our daily activities and spend time alone with God, wholly focused on him.



Jesus, the Son of God, came to serve and give his life for others. Yet one of his habits was to regularly pull aside from the crowds of people and from the busyness of ministry. Jesus knew what it was to work hard but he also knew what it was to stop working and get aside with his Father (see Luke 5:15-16). If anyone could have avoided prayer and just kept going without ever getting to empty, it was Jesus. But, no – he stopped, he left the hustle and bustle of all the people around him, and he found a place where he could be alone and talk with his Father. If Jesus needed this, how much more do we! Often when we’re starting to burnout, it can be linked back to a drift in our time alone with God. Like Martha, we’ve become so busy working for God or doing life that we have neglected our time just sitting and being with Jesus like Mary did (Luke 10:38-42).



So what kind of things do we do when we are along with God?


  • Enjoy God. Just be still and enjoy his closeness.
  • Love and worship him. Express appreciation to him for who he is and all he has done for you.
  • Talk to him. Open up your heart and tell him how you feel. Tell him your needs and concerns.
  • Listen to God. Ask him to speak to you. Tune in to the ‘small still voice’ of his Spirit within you.
  • Read his Word, which are his instructions for our life. His Word is like our ‘daily bread’
  • Pray in the Spirit, using your ‘spiritual language’. In doing so, you pray according to the will of God (Rom.8:26-28) and you build up your own faith (Jude 20). It can be like charging your spiritual batteries.


Spending time alone with God can be like taking a long deep drink of fresh water when you’re feeling dry and thirsty. It energises you and refuels you for your journey.


Why would we not spend time with the God who created the universe and who desires the very best for our life? Why would we pursue other less important things, ignoring his offer! Oh, foolish thinkers we often are (Jeremiah 2:13)! How easily we get distracted by things that hinder us from investing our time in what is most valuable – a relationship with the living God!

Mark Conner Personal Development

Refuel (Pt.1)

Refuel Refuelling is not an optional extra for the Christian life. It is an essential practice and something that must be done on a regular basis. It is not just for the faint of heart or the weak. Even the strong tire and become weary. Even the young run out of energy.


Listen to what the prophet Isaiah had to say about this …

Isa 40:28-31. Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no-one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. NIV

Refuelling takes time and intentional effort. Most often it requires you to stop what you are doing and engage in a refuelling moment. But refuelling is essential if we are going to run our race well, let alone finish what God has called us to be and do. Pray and believe for the Holy Spirit to refuel you today. God wants to continually fill us with his love, power and wisdom for our journey.


More tomorrow …

Mark Conner Current Issues

Stress

Stress2 We live in a world of exponential change that often results in stress in our lives. Stress can come from the high pace of change, from increasing mobility, from time pressures, from work, from feeling like things are out of our control, from fear, from strained relationships, from competition, and from emotions such as frustration and anger. We also need to understand the effect of the combination of stressors – the whole is always greater than the sum of the parts.


Doctor Richard Swensen outlines how stress can affect us in many areas of our life:


  • Psychologically – stress has a profound effect on our psychological well-being, Symptoms can include: depression, withdrawal, apathy, mental fatigue, anxiety, negative thinking, difficulty making decisions, exaggerated worry, anger and hostility, impatience, forgetfulness, and confusion.
  • Physically – our response to stress is also physical. Symptoms can include: rapid pulse, palpitations, increased blood pressure, hyperactivity, ulcers, irritable bowel, tightening of the muscles, headaches, weight changes, compromised immune system, unexplained fatigue, itching, insomnia, and shortness of breath.
  • Behaviourally – what our mind and body experience, our behaviour often express. Behaviours can include: irritation with friends and colleagues, bossiness, outbursts of temper, withdrawal and detachment, sudden tears, changes in eating or sleeping patterns or in our sexual drive, accident proneness, reckless driving, or even compulsive shopping.


Because of the pace of life, the lack of margin, and the stress of living in the 21st century, we can easily drain our reserves and before we know it, we’re running on empty. The warning lights come on and we know we can’t keep going or we’re going to ‘crash and burn’. We must refuel!


More on that tomorrow …

Mark Conner Trivia

The Impact of Exponential Change

Exponential

Our world has experienced an incredible amount of progress in the last 100 years. Progress has been upward and onward, resulting in a rapid acceleration of change. Just think of: the speed of travel (our family took 23 days to travel to the USA via boat back in 1972!), the power of computers (the internet wasn’t available until the mid 1990s – now just over a decade later, over 1.4 billion people use it regularly!), technological advances, etc.




Change is no longer ‘linear’; it is now ‘exponential’.


To illustrate how rapidly exponential numbers accumulate, consider the following example …


If you fold a piece of paper in half forty-two times, how thick would it be?



Thick enough to reach from here to the moon! That’s surprising, isn’t it! If you don’t believe me, click here to see the math.



This illustration helps us appreciate the radical impact accumulative change can have on our lives. Of course, the result of all of this exponential change is STRESS! According to Doctor Richard Swensen, high levels of stress follow progress and change just as exhaust follows traffic. It’s unavoidable.


Pause and think about that.


… more on the topic of stress on Monday.


Enjoy your weekend!

Mark Conner Think About It

Energy

To be highly effective in our work and to also enjoy life to the fullest we need to manage our energy, not just our time. Research reveals that energy, not time, is the most important component of personal effectiveness.


Let me give you an example: If you’re scheduled to have open heart surgery, obviously you’d want your doctor turning up on time. But what kind of mood would you want him or her in – angry, depressed, tired, nervous? Of course not! You’d want them to be awake, confident and fully engaged in what they’re about to do to you! You don’t just want their time … you want the best of their energy!



How’s is your energy level right now? Are you fully engaged in what you are doing each day? Or are you just ‘turning up’?



The key to being ‘fully engaged’ when we need to be is to ensure that we are managing our energy well. You do that by creating a balance between activity and rest in your life … of energy expenditure and energy renewal. If we’re giving out all the time without taking time to disengage and renew your energy, then you’re headed for an energy crisis.


Energy … Think about it. 


Mark Conner Think About It

Internal Stress

Stress

Recent research tells us that a lot of Australians are experiencing a great deal of stress in their life. Life is getting more complex, the pressures are increasing, the pace is getting faster, and a lot of people are struggling to cope.



One of the keys to good stress management is learning to keep our “internal stress” as low as possible so that we have the capacity to cope with the inevitable “external stress” that will come our way.


 


Internal stress is the stress we carry on the inside of us and it usually comes from three things:

  1. Unrealistic expectations (about God, ourselves or others).
  2. Destructive attitudes
  3. Unresolved relational issues

Have you ever seen someone have something very small happen to them and they just lost it. What was going on? The thing that happened to them wasn’t the issue. It was most likely the fact that they were already carrying a bunch of internal stress and this extra thing pushed them over the edge.


 


Adjust your expectations to be more in line with reality.


Deal with negative emotions quickly.


Resolve your interpersonal conflicts.


 


By doing so, you can reduce your level of internal stress significantly, placing you in a position to be able to cope much better with the inevitable stresses of life.


 


Internal Stress … Think about it.

Mark Conner Think About It

Attitude

Developing and maintaining a good attitude in life is vital. However it’s not always easy!


 


One huge misconception about attitudes is that if you have a good attitude you will never feel bad or get upset. How untrue! People with great attitudes experience all the same sorts of negative emotions that other people do, they just work through them constructively and refuse to allow these emotions to hinder their outlook on life.


 


Everyone has times when they feel angry, resentful, worried, afraid, anxious, jealous, and maybe even depressed. The difference between people is how they choose to handle these negative and potentially destructive emotions.


 


Have you ever been shopping and had to use a shopping cart that had one wheel not working? Isn’t it stressful to have to push that thing while it is squeaking and squealing every step of the way? What an energy drain! Yet, that is exactly what it is like when one negative emotion seizes up our inner world. It drains us spiritually, emotionally and physically. That’s why it is so important to deal with negative emotions as quickly as possible so we can live with complete freedom.


 


It’s your choice!


 


Attitude …. Think about it.

Mark Conner Think About It

Smile!

Smile

When I was much younger I had a significant leader give me some feedback. He started out by encouraging me about my potential and my future. Then he said, “Mark, there’s a few things you need to work on. Firstly, you need to smile more. You’ve very tall and that can be quite intimidating for people. Begin to smile more regularly." Then he shared a few other things that we don’t have time to talk about today.

I must admit, at first I was a bit annoyed. “Smile … come on, I’m smiling on the inside!” But then I realised he was right. So I began smiling more. I’d drive down the road and just put a big smile on my face. I’d get into an elevator and I’d smile.

A smile really does make a difference to the atmosphere around you. It warms things up and it tends to draw people to you rather than away from you. You know we don’t really know what Jesus looked like because we don't have a picture or video of him. However, it tells me something about Jesus when the Gospels tell us that children ran up to him. What kind of people do children run towards? Not grumpy people, that’s for sure! I’m sure Jesus had a smile on his face and an enthusiasm about life that was contagious.

Smile … Think about it.

Mark Conner Think About It

Global Issues

Global


Today we are living in a global village. Yes, it’s a big world but we’re all connected in so many ways like at no other time in our history.



Here is Australia we have our own challenges but we really are still a ‘lucky country’. We’ve been blessed in so many ways and it’s easy to forget that many billions of people in our world live on just a few dollars a day.


 


Some of the global issues we are facing are huge – things such as poverty, disease, war, and famine, just to name a few. These challenges are so huge that we can be overwhelmed by them. Yet each one of us can make a difference.


 


Here are a few things that you might consider doing:


 

  1. Sponsor a child in a needy country. Check out Compassion or World Vision for starters. 
  2. Make a financial donation to a reputable world relief agency.
  3. Take a trip to another needy nation and do some ‘hands on’ humanitarian work.
  4. Pray – after all, God cares about the poor and needy.

Jesus told us to love God with all of our heart and to love our neighbour as ourselves. In our global village, our neighbour is the person next door but also those around the world.


 


We can’t do everything but each one of us can do something.


 


Global Issues … Think about it.

Mark Conner Personal Development

A Personal Check Up (Pt. 6)

Our final question is:



5. How is your love?



Love is the most important thing in our life (see 1 Corinthians 13). As someone once said, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care!”



Christian love is a choice to do good to others.



Love forgives and seeks reconciliation. Have you been offended this year? Has someone hurt you? Have you hurt someone? How is it with your soul? Have you forgiven? Have you asked for forgiveness?



Enlarge your ‘circle of love’. Who is in your circle? Is it an open circle?



Jesus accepted everyone no matter who they were (see Romans 5:8). His ministry philosophy was “Come as you are … and be changed.” Is that ours too or it is more like the religious leaders of his day who basically said, “Change to be like us … and then you can come.”



Ask God to fill you afresh with His love … for all people.



How is your love?



Conclusion

How did you go with your check up?

What will you do about the results? After all, only YOU are responsible for these things. I know I have some things to work on. If we ignore the check up, we’ll pay for it. However, if we make the necessary adjustments, we will see many benefits flow into our lives.

All the best for the second half of your year!